pay attention, i will say this only once?

shhh, did you hear what i said? I would say this only once.

hey, put your mouse down for a second. i need your full attention. this could prevent all out holy electronic war.

this is how you can start an all-out war on the frontiers of cyberspace.

first, take two good friends who joke and tease each other over an electronic mailing list.

next, throw in a little confusion and misunderstanding, along with mistaken intentions.

throw in a liberal dash of “Btw, if you would have noticed, You have already been Ignored. no need to re-confirm that.” and you have the beginnings of a cold war, one in which there are no winners, only losers.
—
i remember years ago when i was active in the IRC (Internet Relay Chat) scene, there’d be scores of us techno-savvy teenagers who logged on to the internet and just passed time by doing the Seinfeld (talking about nothing).

And this time we had an outing to a games arcade.

This girl was standing at the fishing reality simulator (essentially a plastic rod, a nylon ‘fishing line’ connected to a reel in the machine and a big television screen showing pictures of the fish in the water.

as she stood at the monitor, her slim frame quivering as the line jerked her back and forth, she started calling for help as she yanked at the ‘fishing rod’.

I jumped beside her, grabbed her hands and started pulling the rod and reeling the fish in.

having scored her catch, she thanked me and I walked off beaming to myself.
—
I got home later that evening, logged on the #singapore channel and people start private messaging me.

“hey dude, what happened?”

“huh?” i replied

“ey, y u do tt?” another person messaged.

“do what?” i was puzzled

“you know, the other guy in the channel said he’s going to call you out and protect her honour the next time he sees you” another helpful soul offered.

“WHAT????” i ‘yelled’ in my moment of virtual exasperation!

It appeared that the girl had told the others that I had ‘violated’ her personal space and she felt uncomfortable about the experience and practically ran out of the arcade.

Although this happened more than 10 years ago, i’m still mystified today about her intentions.

Had she felt:
1) genuinely ‘violated’ even as she thanked and smiled at me?
2) weird because she knew that the guy who liked her had been watching her and would feel threatened that she felt good about being around other guys, even as she knew that he would feel insecure that she would not always be besotted by him, even though she knew that he would still like to hang out with other girls with whom he’d never have a chance with, because she would likely be the only ever girl he would find a sympathetic ear with and would spend time with him knowing that he’s be someone who would never find someone as good as her and could only fantasise about being with whoever it was in his mind? (yes, i agree, it’s confusing)
3) angry and upset that she hadn’t landed the famed “catch of the day” high score and missed it by only a few points. (although the arcade owner would turn off all machines at the end of the day, wiping off all high scores).

Regardless, it feel like a silly experience and even as i did my best to apologise to her and explain the situation to him, they would have nothing to say or do with me.

it later emerged that other guys and girls in the group had had similar experiences of ‘misunderstandings’ as well, and had gradually dropped out of the group.
—
honestly, the experience just reflected the infantile maturity of some of the group members and i guess it was just their fifteen nanoseconds of electronic fame. I guess in today’s context, the girl might’ve spent the next 3 weeks villifying me (until she found her next victim). good luck on landing your book deal!

the bottomline for me is that the internet remains one of the best places for cyberse…er, research and work and factual matters.

if it’s something important, especially in interpersonal terms, it’s just like the courier advertisement goes, ‘you can’t fax or email a handshake or a look in the eye”

to my friends who are in the midst of their electronic tiff, i am thinking you’ll get over this bump in the road to your friendship soon.

in the meantime, live well and be well.